Pearltruths

Your Own Company is the best feeling in the world of independence and freedom, Whatever Comes up

I Find it Therapeutic and Wish You Do As Well

I got to do my normal routine walking the neighborhood to get my exercise in, to grab a bite and get coffee for the day. However, for some reason I was aching more than usual, but took my walk anyway. You can do this practice for you as well, but you will in time discover what works best for you. What may work for me may not work for the next person. I hope you will find your inner guidance when trying out different methods that suits you well.

Today looked somewhat overcast, but not. It was one of those mornings when it appears even mother nature wasn’t sure she wanted rain or have the sun come out.

Hence, it was half cloudy, half blue skies. :)) Hey, that works for me. Initially, I would’ve taken the bus, because I haven’t on the weekend, but it seemed to have taken awhile to arrive, and then a gentlemen said the bus would be approaching in about 10-15 minutes. Then I remembered, duh, it’s Saturday, and the schedule is slightly different.

So, I resumed walking. It’s not that far. For others, if you have a car, then wonderful for you!

I arrived at the cafe and ordered an ice mocha, with oat, no whip. The day seemed muggy on top of mildly overcast so getting a cold drink for a change seemed fitting and sounded delicious. Sometimes, the baristas work on auto pilot I noticed. I was sitting down waiting for my order, which it was fairly quickly made. And then I saw it was made with whip. I don’t have whip cream with my drinks.

That’s when I knew. Yep, the barista is on auto pilot. I didn’t order whip, but they put whip cream. Have you experienced that? I just took my drink, sat down on the chairs outside in the somewhat mild sun and enjoyed it along with my pastry mixed with cherry tomatoes.

I understand auto pilot mode and having whip once in a while was ok. Normally, I don’t have whip cream since I’m lactose intolerant. How about you? What’s your favorite expresso?

Hey, my little breakfast was awesome, nonetheless. Peacefully….. at that! I didn’t stay long lounging though so that I can get home and rest my back from cleaning up and doing laundry all morning.

And I woke up very early to a beautiful day with none other, the holy spirit. I must admit in case I haven’t already. That I am a spiritual, yogi, healthy minded, feminine lady with a perky and intentional outlook in life. At the same time, chill. I like my peace and practice calm by helping others where needed, or just relaxing.

Are you spiritual or just live life as a normal Catholic, however you call it.

You can Change What works Positively For You

During the years, the past four years, In my circle, I have learned to let go of people that do not offer peace and the vibe doesn’t feel right between us. It is one way; you get to know who you are and what you want in life. I do not force any one to like me because I can’t.

You can’t please everyone. And it wouldn’t serve any good purpose to keep trying either .

And I want to be me and nobody else, right? That includes blocking them or deleting their contact on my phone.

With all of that said. On Friday, on my way to work, someone calls my name behind me, from a distance. And I turn around to see he was a former colleague who was very rude to me in the past, despite my attempts to be helpful to him.

Let alone be a sounding board as a friend.

Here’s the story. In the past, I invited him and his partner to my new sanctuary. To have them over and hang out. At the time, to build rapport, camaraderie I thought.

However, I hadn’t been in touch with him previous to that invite for about a couple months because I was in the midst of moving.

And had a traumatic accident and basically had to heal and just take care of myself. And these situations take time.

He reacted to my invite by saying, “I haven’t heard from you in a minute,” and then brushed me off. On that invite, they had to come over to hang out at my place, and we could’ve had the conversation with him on what’s been going on with me in my life, because that’s what you do with “friends.”.

Now, in my book, and my understanding. That’s what I define, a “friendship” is. You don’t always have to hear from friends, every week, or every month to call it a friendship. Sometimes, we all have stuff going on.

Friends, will be there when you fall, when you’re going through hard times, for parties, etc. So, after a couple failed text responses from him, I let it go. That’s what I had considered toxic for me. So, I stopped contacting him, and then yesterday, suddenly Ruben. We’ll call him Ruben.

Came up behind me and we work at the same building, so we accidentally run into each other. He starts talking to me, asking me how I’m doing. I replied, oh, so you’re talking to me now? He said he had a new phone. Oh, don’t worry, I said, I didn’t call you. And he just went on talking, ignoring my statement. As if nothing ever happened.

We had the very short “small talk”, and then I entered my department. I have already moved on and also deleted his name on my phone. God bless him. Life goes on. Perhaps you feel differently on your definition of friendship. Each to their own. This is just how I feel.

What You Hope To Gain From This Experience

You work with people, colleague’s, friends, acquaintance’s. However, you want to call them, but regardless, they are from all walks of life. One always wants to leave them feeling good and safe when that person is around you. My goal is to leave a positive imprint of my knowledge, generosity and wisdom of how you can live your life that is best for you. I want to be able to do the stuff that I wasn’t taught when I was growing up. My parents didn’t urge me to get an education. They didn’t talk to us about the importance of having options. When you got and education. That there are options. So getting a degree was never a topic of discussion.

Almost feel I was misguided. Which I probably was. They advised that I could apply at a Temp Agency. What the heck was that? A Temp Agency? That was only to gain some knowledge of work and earn some type of living.

So, I grew up flipping burgers for a minute, which is when I discovered I wouldn’t be a cook in a restaurant. Haha! :P Then I worked at a KFC joint. That was a short period too! I was lost for a while growing up. All of this, misguided. But, that’s all my dad knew.

With absent and divorced parents at 13 years old. That was no fun. At least my dad was around for the most part. My mom was not. So, I personally, try to teach what I learned, and taught my inner child how not to be, and parented myself on how I want to treat others to learn things that I didn’t learn from my parents because they didn’t know any better.

There’s no blame, because my parents did the best they could with what they knew. My mom’s auntie mistreated her. So, my dad made up for her absence by babying me, which in the long run was also not so helpful, but he did the best he could considering he had four of my siblings to raise apart from me.

Hence, for me I realized I was hungry and desired an education in college but intellectually could not keep up. This realization surfaced gradually over the years, that I took one to two classes a semester for the next 5-7 years in my 30’s at the College of Alameda, and Laney, the Peralta Colleges in the bay area. And it was the last time I would see my college years come to an end.

My kids were already in high school, and my eldest, graduated and was working at Starbucks. I had a long-term boyfriend at the time. Pardon me if I went off a tangent for a minute there. But this was my life. Stop here…..

The next chapter for me was living independently and starting fresh given the experiences I’ve learned and moving forward from toxic environments, even if it meant family.

Alameda was my destination of choice for a safe and friendly place that I call home. It’s also a community of well-rounded friends that I’ve met and family that I spend time with frequently, one to three to four times a year. There’s always some reason we meet up. On the side, or lead by example and as a hobby, I like to teach women to surround yourself with positive people, and places, that you feel good being around… A place that you feel safe. In this day and age, it is really different. The economy has changed since we also have a different “leader” in office. It’s all the more reason to be extra vigilant in your day-to-day activities and just exercising self-care. Please feel free to read my stories and find and explore what may work best for you.

Binge watching my show at my days end

During my t.v. time at home, I cooked some drumsticks in my air fryer, boiled some drumsticks on the stove to make a little stew, adding romaine lettuce chopped up so that the leaves aren’t so long. It takes about 45 minutes to an hour to boil them so that the meat is soft and they just fall off the bone. Added some chicken broth and it’s done! Then I just watched Manifest, and a little of the “Pit.” Adding in my yoga exercise to relieve my back, which is the reverse bridge, done every morning and afternoon.

As the evening comes to a close, I’m already tired and everything is cleaned up and organized. I’ve already had dinner; it is now bedtime. I took a short break from blogging the past couple weeks, which will resume on Sunday morning again. For now, it’s time to close Saturday. It is my hope you all had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!